Submitted by Ely Etting
email@example.com | 184.108.40.206
I am signing the petition. (you’ll notice I refer to the mother as “deadbeat” because in my case she is the deadbeat not me. And any mother that is refusing to work and contribute to the financial support of her child is a deadbeat. It is not the sole responsibility of the father to financially support his child)
Here is what needs changed:
1. I know NC does this but it needs to be manadatory in every State….Both parents should be held equally financially resonsible for their children. One parent should not bare 100% financial responsibilty because the other (usually the mother) refuses to work. The father doesn’t have a choice whether or not to work…he works or goes to jail. There should be an automatic minimum wage entered for the mother if she is not working. Food Stamps and medicaid should be added as income and factored in to calculating what the father will pay. The father doesn’t have a say in a mother’s refusal to work or whether or not she enrolls the child in medicaid but the system makes a father pay back medicaid. This is not the 1950s Mothers…both parents need to work in order to support their home and children. Why does the system encourage deadbeat mothers to stay on welfare? If they treated welfare as added income when calculating child support it wouldn’t be so attractive to deadbeat mothers would it?
2. If mothers requesting child support are on welfare then they should be required to become employed within 6 months or enter a higher education program in order to become employable within 1 – 2yrs max. There is child care assistance available now for working mothers/poor and I believe that if a mother choses to put a father under court order for CS then they should be held legally to get a job or face jail time as does the father. Equal consequences all around.
3. Standard of living should be fair. If the deadbeat mother refuses to work and the father has worked hard, went to school and worked towards a higher standard of living he should not be punished by being ordered to hand over his added income to someone who will never spend it on his child. Any child support ordered above a 50/50 share should be set aside in a trust for the child for use in education or hardship later. The deadbeat mother should not be able to reap the benefits of a father increasing his standard of living….only the child should reap this benefit. The mother should not be entitled to any standard of living increase that the father not living in the home has worked hard for only the child should see that increase held in trust.
4. If you voluntarily pay you shouldn’t be forced to pay by garnishment. I believe they order garnished wages if the custodial (deadbeat mother) is on welfare. Just because the mother is a deadbeat and refuses to work doesn’t mean the father is deadbeat. A father should not be demoralized and punished because he fathered a child …he should be given the option to pay voluntarily. If and only when he fails to pay should there be an order to garnish wages.
5. Taxes: If deadbeat mother is not working then the Father should be given the right at the time the child support order is written to claim child as dependent on taxes as well as have the right to other tax deductions. If both parents are working then at the time of the CS order the tax deduction should be awarded equally…where every other year each parent gets to claim the child on taxes as a dependent. Leaving it up to the father having to ask the mother to sign form 8332 is never going to happen. In my case the deadbeat mother is allowing her father to claim MY child on his taxes…. She doesn’t work and when I asked he to let me have the deduction she ripped up the form in my face. Nice, huh? And CS enforcement wonders why men don’t pay…geez
6. Custody and Child Support orders should go hand in hand. If you don’t follow Custody orders you don’t get your money deadbeat mothers!!!! If you try and poison your child against the father you don’t get your money deadbeat mothers!!!!! only if this could be reality. But seriously…in cases where parents were not married there is no divorce and custody order…most of the time it is a verbal agreement that changes day to day based on the deadbeat mothers mood. you guys know what I am talking about. That control thing the custodial parent loves to manipulate.
7. A percentage of child support should be held in trust for the child. I am not saying 20% or 50% but something like 10%-15% should be automatically held in trust for the child. I’m tired of seeing my child in clothes that don’t fit, cheap clothes and shoes, haircuts that look bad because her mom tries to cut it but yet the mother goes to a professional stylist, buys cigarettes and alcohol and puts gas in her car with child support money. She doesn’t work and gets $500 in food stamps per month. Has another child by another man who doesn’t pay CS so where do you think my CS for my child is going?
I would take any one of the 7 changes. The system treats men as deadbeats from the start. In my case I kept logs on the mothers comments and actions from the time I left the household. Copies of “Facebook” entries of derogatory comments the mother made against me. I had copies of checks and receipts she refused to sign for cash I gave her for the child support I paid voluntarily. I provided an expense/budget sheet for both myself and the mother. When I went to my first mediation I laid out all the documents in front of me and had copies for the case worker. I told the truth and found out about the lies the mother told the case worker. In turn, the case worker saw that I was a devoted father who took the time to be a part of my child’s life and be responsible by voluntarily paying child support. The system was fair to me and when I became temporarily employed and filed for a reduction in support the system in NC approved the reduction. I was fortunate to be treated “fairly” in regards to the reduction. But I will say that is the only thing fair that has happened. Garnishment is not fair. Not getting the tax deduction is not fair. The welfare system not requiring the mother to get a job within 6 months is not fair. Most of all none of this considers the actual welfare of the child. The hateful comments the mother has made to my child about me is clearly reflected in my child’s changed behavior, avoidance and hateful, vengeful comments my 4 yr old makes. There is so much wrong with this system.
Please take a moment and SIGN for Child Support Reform. You do not have to be directly involved in the Child Support System to Sign this Petition. Yet, we are all apart of the System; if someones’ U.S. Constitutional Rights are being violated, you are being violated. How much more Government interference are you able to put up with? Presently, the Children are always the losers; relationships are being ruined, thousands go to jail and thousands commit suicide each year! PLEASE USE THE COMMENT FORM TO SIGN LOCATED AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS PAGE; Thank You!
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firstname.lastname@example.org | 220.127.116.11